moving right along......

I remember the first couple of weeks that I was in Ulsan, I had major anxiety about being on public transportation.  Mostly because I was concerned that I was on the wrong bus, or I wouldn't recognize my destination when I got there, or that I would do something completely wrong.  Apparently when you want the bus to stop at the next stop you're supposed to press the red "stop" button.  Um, I didn't know this for an inconvienently long time, so, well, I did a bit of extra walking, when it would finally stop, because someone else finally needed to get off and would push the button.  I also didn't know that you were supposed to be waiting at the door to get off when your stop arrived.  Me??... oh no, I would be sitting, just assuming that the bus would stay stopped until I casually made my way to the exit, but, well, not the case for obvious reasons.  Another bus learning experience is that there is a lot of body language involved w/ busses and people waiting at the bus stop.  If you're at a stop, without a lot of people the bus won't always stop if you don't give off some sort of signal (standing up, gestering w/ your hand, or walking towards the bus--or running as the case often is).  I didn't figure this out for a couple of weeks and would just sit my rear on the bench, assuming the busses always stopped at every stop all the time. During this learning curve, I would sit in the bus and see all the other people completely relaxed.  I silently prayed that I would eventually be one of these calm,, cool & collected people who seemed to have the utmost confidence in Korean public transportation (now I can say that the public transit is AWESOME).   I was riding a bus the other day and remembering that awful feeling of anxiety and I'm now thankful that I am now one of those relaxed people on the bus. 

Even in the super market here, I about had an anxiety attack the first several times I went in there.  The main super market I go to, is multi-level and laid out like a maze.  There are multiple escalators and I never knew which one to go up and would end up getting very turned around.  Now, it is easy and almost an enjoyable experience.  It's just nice to reflect back on the way you felt/were and then to realize all the learning & transitioning that has been taking place the entire time without even being aware of it.   I had to keep giving myself daily pep-talks of, "you will get through this, you will figure things out eventually"...

Much of the "honeymoon" phase of korea has worn off in recent weeks.  I find myself going loopy over the ways that things are done here.  Of course, I never want to complain too much to people about Korea because I don't want to look like I am passing judgement on an entire country by making grandiose blanket statements.  More often these large statements can come off as arrogant, egocentric or down-right prejudice.  I think it is safe to say none of this applies to any of the korea complaining I will do, but please feel free to correct me if I am wrong.  :)     I have talked to several foriegners and once we get started on the "ohhhh my gosh this is soooo insane" band wagon we can't seem to stop ourselves.  From person to person we all have the same exact complaints that just drive our western brains absolutely bonkers.  

 Korea is a very interesting place all the way around.  You meet so many great, nice, gracious people---but the society at large almost seems inconsiderate and unaware (through western eyes), if that makes sense?     I am trying to compare my thoughts about Korea, to the global perception of America in the sense of realizing how Americans come off globally, but when you really get to know the individuals, you realize how great many people are. But if you just look at America and make a lot of blanket statements about the society & people, you might be right, 'in general' but when it gets down to the individuals, none of those blanket statements really apply.   I am trying to keep this in mind when I make those comments about Korea.  Because I LOVE the basic niceness of the individuals.  To name a few examples:  My favorite restaurant owner & son buy me dinner on occasion and they say such nice things about me and they really take an interest in my family/dan/life etc.   Same with my neighbors who go out of their way to bring me treats on occasion.  Random children running up to me and giving me candy.  Strangers giving up their bus seats for me. Or several people, like my coffee shop friends or other Koreans who have gone out of their way to make me feel incredibly welcomed into their world particularly at a time when I was feeling very lonely and had no friends.  To them, I am forever grateful.   So when I start thinking that Korea is "rude" or "inconsiderate" with all the pushing & shoving, it's good to remember that there are soooooooooooo many positive and downright sweet encounters with individuals that more than make up for the appearance of the society at large.  

So here are a few of my grandiose blanket statements about the country and people.  Again, please take it all lightly, as I am not complaining, just making my own observations about what I perceive to be happening.  With Koreans, I have noticed, that they ALL want to be first.  This insistence on being first is noticeable in my students all the way up to the older generations.  Starting off in my classes, I will be working with a student and I will hear, "TEACHERRRRRRRRR MEEEEEEE", over and over and over and over again until I go over to them.  It's truly like they don't see me working with another kid.  I know part of that is being a kid, but I have never seen it quite like this with American kids.  Another example is that I will tell the entire class that each one of them will get a sticker.  So I start walking around the room and handing out stickers.  Clearly, I am one person, and can only hand out 1 sticker at a time.  But, they will crowd me, all wanting to be first and tripping and shoving each other to get one before the next kid.  It's pretty intense.  Another example of wanting to be first is on the road.  There will be a line of cars wanting to take a left in the ONLY left hand turn lane and cars from the back will pull out of line and rush to the front of the line and recklessly do an "illegal" double turn or cut the person off in the front of the line.  Another  example is you will clearly be in line at a register and people will blatantly cut in front of you (which, just so you know i have gotten very aggressive on holding my place in line--old lady or not--).  This sort of thing really happens ALL THE TIME.  Another is when you are in an elevator and it stops on your floor, you will attempt to get off, but the people getting on crash right into you because THEY WILL be getting on, before ever letting you off.   It's almost like this unawareness of other people around them.  If you are a pedestrian and someone gets into their car AND they even make eye contact with you, once they start their engine, it's like they forget they saw you 2 seconds prior and almost run you over (no exageration).  So in closing, I must say again, I really love this country and I love the people here.  But it is a bit chaotic and confusing to me and I am sure that a lot of what I am saying is probably not really the case, but through my eyes it just seems like it is, because with the language and cultural barrier I am not sure I will ever have a firmer understanding.

In my summer camp right now, it is made up of 3 Americans, 1 Canadian & 2 British.  We banter quite a bit and love to harass each other on the stereotypes of the other's country.  It's funny because you, at times, can't help yourself by being the complete and total stereotype that you are!  Because, well, you are, in fact, American or British etc.   So when someone calls you out on being that stereotype, we just laugh it off and then starts another round of good natured banter.  I am teaching over 30 classes a week at this summer camp.  Normally we only teach 22 hours a week, so this is a lot more.  It is very intensive work and I get home totally drained, but having other native English speakers there has been so great for all of us.  On a normal school day, I never have conversations, so the only time I talk is when I am teaching.  My conversations for weeks on end normally consist of "hi, how are you?"  "I am  fine, thank you, how are you?"  "fine"  "nice weather" "yes".  Anyway, being able to express complex thoughts or even make jokes has been wonderful.  Not to mention some great new friends.  Sadly though, several of them are leaving in a few weeks to go home.  Dan will be here in "7 sleeps", so hopefully having had my English "exercised" these past couple of weeks, I won't Bombard him with every last thought, feeling, experience I have had every moment of every waking day for the past 6 months!  :)  Ahhh, but then again, it's me....who am I kidding?

At this summer camp there was a day last week that was called "sports day", in which we spent 2 hours with the kids doing various activities in a round-robin style.  The night before we had a meeting and the main teacher just told one of the teachers that he will have to be in front of the gym, on the stage to help her out with something (he was not happy about be "volunteered").   So she started picking an afternoon "volunteer" to be with her on stage.  None of the teachers volunteerd and everyone is squirming, so I took one for the team and said I would do it.  Again, I must clarify that she said SHE would just need an extra body up there with her, kind of for moral support so she was not the only one on stage.     So afternoon time comes around, and she calls me up and I get on stage.  Right then, her phone rings  and OF COURSE she takes the call and leaves the stage and goes and stands off in the corner chatting on her phone, leaving me standing there like a doof with 100+ eyes on me.   It's pretty common here to get zero information on anything and so I"ve learned to stop asking questions, which is why I didn't know what I was doing on stage.  Anyway, I stand there while she is having a really hilarious conversation, meanwhile I am looking at the other co-teachers, asking, "WHAT am I supposed to do???"   Apparently I was supposed to start doing warm up exercises.  So I just started doing some ridiculous stretches for an uncomfortable amount of time.

Going to the cell phone answering here:   It is NOT at all uncommon for teachers to answer their cell phones at the most innappropriate times.  They will be in mid-sentence, teaching their class--their cell phone rings, and they just walk over to the side and start having a conversation, leaving the students just looking at them.  You see this not just w/ teachers but with many workers.  It's very interesting.  Of course, given the fact that on occasion teachers drink Soju at lunch and come back to school typsy--not sure why the cell phone thing surprises me!  :)  IT is just a very different culture here, and I'm not sure if I lived here for the rest of my life, I would ever fully understand it.  And that's okay! 

 If you are caucasian, there is a 95% guess that they will guess you to be American.  I didn't know this until recently.  I was at the gym the other day running on the treadmill and a Korean comes up to me and asked me if I was American.  I was so shocked and kind of freaked out that even my run screamed American.  I get it all the time, otherwise, and have just assumed that chances are I have a very American walk/stance that is screaming my nationality before a word is ever spoken.  Speaking of words though, most Koreans can't tell the difference between various American accents and even other English speaking country accents (not that this is a big deal, because I can't tell the different between different Korean accents and I guess they are so drastically different that Koreans have a hard time understanding another Korean with a strong accent.  I gues they are so drastically different that North-SK, like Seoul and South SK like Ulsan/Busan feel like they are speaking another language at times).  But it's really fun to show them the difference in accents by picking out a single phrase that they are comfortable with such as, "How are you?" and then say it with as many differnt American accents as you can think of.  Then for fun it is entertaining to throw in other accents (brittish, aussie, etc).  They get a huge kick out of it and love to try to guess which accent you are doing.  Of course, I am terrible at accents, so I should probably stop. 

Tid Bits:

I went to make an appointment for a hair cut and color.  I have been to this guy one other time, so he knows about my "secret" stash of grey hair, and made no secret about laughing at it.  I am in there yesterday and I tell him I need another color & cut, so he starts looking at my roots, and he is laughing and says something to the customer in his chair who announces, "ohhhh ha ha ha white color"!   So I looked at him and put my finger up to my mouth and say, "Shhhhhhhhhhh--secret"...and they got a pretty big kick out of it.  Discression with anything medical/personal doesn't really exist here. 

A favorite English saying that all my kids at every school loves to say is, "Do you want to Die?" but they say "die" like "Dyyyeeeeeeeee".  For some reason the kids really love it when you say it to them, and then put your finger up to your neck like you are slicing it. Just for the record I am not threatening the kids, the regular teachers do this to them as well. It's just some sort of funny ha ha thing that is endlessly entertaining for them.  :)   Sometimes you can add in a, "Do you want to dieeeee, byyy me??!"  And they will just roll with laughter.